Looking for God
by dothdomarvelous
Summary: Sam, Dean, and Cas go to investigate what seems like a normal demon attack, but when they discover a strange girl everything changes. She's one of the few Nephilim in the world, and happens to just be the daughter of a powerful archangel. And she can help Cas do one thing- find God.
1. Chapter 1

**This is just a fanfic I've been thinking about writing for a while. I probably won't have regular updates between this and my other Avengers fanfic, but I'll definitely keep it going. This begins at the beginning of season 5 when Cas first starts looking for God, and is AU from then on. So enjoy this first chapter and I'd love to hear what you think!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER ONE**

Dean sighed and took a big bite of his juicy bacon cheeseburger. The greasy taste of beef and melted cheese exploded in his mouth. He grunted in satisfaction.

"You know how to we long it's been since I've had a burger this good?" Dean said through his bite of cheeseburger, waving it gently for emphasis. He grinned, shaking his head a bit. "Way too long." He took another big bite.

His brother, Sam, who was sitting across from him in a rowdy bar in the middle of an insignificant town in Montana, rolled his eyes at Dean's loud chewing noises and obvious enjoyment of the greasy food.

"What?" Dean said, his mouth hanging slightly open. "I'm allowed to enjoy myself. Just because we're on a job doesn't mean I can't relax and eat some of the best food ever created on Earth."

"I thought pie was the best food on Earth," Sam stated, his eyebrows raised.

"Depends what mood I'm in. Right now, this bacon cheeseburger is really hitting the spot," Dean grinned, leaning back lazily in his chair and taking a long drink of his beer. Sam looked away for a second, slight frustration written across his face. He watched a pool game going on across the bar, the balls clacking sharply against one another.

Dean heaved a breath and set his half eaten burger back in the plate. He let his chair fall back forward with a slight creaking sound. "What is it this time?"

"Well, it's just that we're on an important job right now, and all you care about is bar food and beer," Sam said, waving a hand toward Dean's plate. Dean set down his beer bottle sharply on the scratched wooden table.

"Fine. What do you got?" Dean relented. "Heard anything from Cas?"

"He said he wanted to go out and check up on some places in town. He'll be back as soon as possible," Sam supplied.

"Who knows when that'll be," Dean grunted. "Besides, this job just feels a little off to me."

"How?"

"It's just the way Cas is acting. Like something else is here that we don't even know about. I mean, is this even our type of job? We don't work for heaven."

"It is," a gruff voice broke in next to Dean. He jumped, splashing some of his beer across his arm.

"God, Cas. Don't do that," Dean admonished the angel. He pulled a couple rough brown paper napkins from the dispenser and soaked up the spilled beverage. He balled up the napkins and dropped them on his plate.

"What have you found?" Sam cut in, leaning over the table expectantly.

"You were right. There have been a slew of strange deaths over at one of the schools," Cas reported. He paused for a second to look around the bar, taking in the neon lights and loud conversations.

"They all exploded?" Sam said, his eyebrows raised in surprise. Cas nodded slightly. "Internal organs liquified, then splattered all of the premise."

"What could do that?" Sam wondered. Dean let his beer bottle fall onto the table. He shrugged. "Demons?"

"Seems like it," Cas said, pulling out the empty chair next to Dean and sitting down in it.

"What do they want here? It's in the middle of nowhere, and as far as I can tell, nothing big or historic has happened," Sam said, his voice tinged with frustration. Cas only studied a group of men and women who were talking and laughing loudly over at the other end of the bar.

Sam reached down underneath his chair and pulled his silver laptop out of his backpack. He flipped the lid up, the screen lighting up his face.

"Let's see. Evan Holmes, David Creevy, and Sarah Mitchell. Silver Bow County, Montana," Sam muttered under his breath as he typed the information into the search bar on his laptop. He clicked search and quickly scanned the websites that popped up.

After a couple minutes of award silence from Cas and the downing of two beers curtesy of Dean, Sam found the information he was looking for.

"Guys," Sam said urgently, pulling Cas out of his stupor.

"What do you got?" Dean prompted. Sam spun the computer around so Cas and Dean could read the information Sam had pulled up on the three kids.

"They all go to the same school," Dean noticed. "St. Michael's?"

"Yeah."

"So what? Just another run-of-the-mill demon infestation?" Dean mused. Sam shook his head.

"I don't think so. Get this," Sam said, turning the computer back towards him and clicking on a couple links. He swung the laptop around and pointed to a list of names. "These are the kids in the school orchestra, and as you can see Evan Holmes was her stand parter. Not only that, but Sarah Mitchell was her cousin, and David Creevy was her best friend."

"Was who's best friend?" Cas broke in.

"A girl named Madeleine Smith. She has connections with all of the victims," Sam answered, shutting the laptop's lid with a snap.

Dean drained the last few drops of his beer. "Where does she live?"

"7816 Mockingbird Lane," Sam recited. Dean stood up, pushing his chair back with a harsh scraping sound that could be heard even over the loud country music that blared in the bar. He dropped a wad of cash onto the table. He shrugged on his worn leather coat. "Then let's blow this popsicle stand."

"Blow what?" Cas asked, confusion evident on his face.

"Nothing. It's just an expression," Dean said, striding out of the bar. "Let's go."

{~~~~~}

Dean pulled the Impala up in front of a blue house. He quickly checked the address then swung out of the car, the old doors creaking. Leftover flakes from last night's snowfall swirled through the air. Dean's breath rose in frosty clouds in front of his face. He adjusted the black coat over his neatly pressed suit and tie. Sam stood behind him, his long brown hair catching stray snowflakes. He fiddled with his dark purple tie, pulling it tightly around his neck. He looked around the snow encrusted street, letting a slow breath out. Cas appeared beside him, snow covering his usual trench coat in a soft fluffy layer. He was studying the deserted street with searching eyes, taking in every detail of the road. Houses lined the street in varying sizes. Snow covered everything in a smooth white layer. Dean faced the blue house in front of them, taking a deep breath before stepping forward across the street, Sam and Cas following close behind.

Dean walked up the wooden front steps slowly, placing his feet to avoid patches of slippery ice. He paused for a second in front of the white pristine front door. He checked behind him to make sure Cas and Sam were there, then knocked crisply against the door several times. They waited tensely, Dean's hands tucked deep into his pockets and his ears red with cold.

Dean jumped when the door finally swung open to reveal the face of a girl about fifteen or sixteen, her hair long and a dark caramel color. Her eyes were dark brown and dull. She looked tired, a small flicker of sadness and fear appearing when she took in the two suited men and a man in a trench coat standing on her front porch.

"FBI," Dean said, pulling his fake identification out of his jacket with the smooth grace of someone who has done this a million times. Sam did the same. She leaned in, reading the ID's with narrowed eyes.

"Nice try," she said, her voice accusing. "Those are fake."

"What?" Dean feigned surprise. He flipped his badge around to look at it. Sam frowned slightly.

"The number is wrong. The format was changed last year, too," she said. Dean looked at Sam. That's exactly what another kid had said to them a long time ago.

Dean sighed and flipped the ID shut and tucked it back away into his jacket.

"You're right. We're not FBI," Sam conceded. The girl shifted back onto her heels, leaning against the open door. She wore a black shirt that read, come to the nerd side, we have pi. Her face was free of any makeup, which Dean thought strange for a high school girl. She was tall, about 5'7, and had a softly rounded face. A silver chain hung around her neck and was tucked in her shirt. Dean assumed she was Madeleine.

"Then what are you?"

"Hunters," Cas said. Dean resisted the urge to face palm.

"Really, Cas?" He muttered out of the corner of his mouth. Cas just looked back at him innocently.

"No, it's okay," she said. "You guys must be investigating the demon attacks."

"You know that they're demons?" Sam questioned incredulously. She looked down for a couple seconds.

"Yes."

"How?" Dean stepped forward. Madeleine hesitated. Dean could practically see the memories replaying behind her eyes, the sadness that filled them.

"Um," she stammered.

"Why don't we come in?" Cas said, his voice gentle. Dean looked at him in surprise. Cas had a small, soft smile on his face. His blue eyes were filled with compassion.

"Yeah," Madeleine said. She stepped back to allow them into the house, a cold winter wind shoving at their backs as she swung the door shut. The house was warm, and had the slight scent of vanilla. There was a staircase in front of them, with a living room off to the left. Hannah led them through, gesturing for them to sit on the leather couches arranged so people could talk to each other comfortably.

"There's some coffee in the kitchen, if you want some. My foster parents won't be home for a while," she said. Sam nodded, Cas smiling in response. Dean adjusted his jacket, having taken his coat off earlier. He sat down in the couch and opened his mouth to respond.

"Do you have any-"

"Beer," she said, cutting him off. Dean could only stare, surprised.

"How did you know?"

"You look like the beer type," she answered simply. She turned away, only to return a minute later with a frosty beer for Dean and two cups of steaming coffee for Cas and Sam. She settled into the couch across from them, clutching a green chipped mug of tea in her hands.

"So Madeleine, how do you know about the hunters?" Dean prompted.

"You can call me Maddy," she began, sitting forward in her seat and turning her mug of tea in her hands slowly. Finally, she answered softly.

"My mother was killed by a demon when I was five years old. I think he was called Azazel."

"The Yellow-Eyed demon," Sam realized. "But I thought he only killed the parents of psychic six-month-olds."

"I don't know," Maddy said, shaking her head. "I only know that my mother was killed, and I almost was too. I walked into my bedroom one night to see a black figure standing near my bed. I was young, so I froze, not knowing what to do. Then I felt something drop onto my forehead and looked up to see my mother with a red stain spreading across her shirt." Maddy then paused, as if she were thinking about what to say next. "Then she burst into flames, screaming. The fire was all around me. The heat made my skin burn and the smoke choked me. I was stuck until a bright light came into my bedroom, saving me."

"What?" Sam said, his nose wrinkling. "What was the bright light?"

"I don't know. There was a voice that accompanied it, though. It was almost like singing, and clear as bells. That's all I really remember."

"Friggin' angels," Dean muttered under his breath, rubbing a hand across his forehead.

"But if it's angels, then how could you hear them? And look at their true form without your eyes burning?" Sam wondered.

"I don't know," she said, frustration creeping into her voice.

"Some people have the gift," Cas said. He looked into Maddy's eyes, unblinking. "You must be able to interact with angels safely."

"Maybe." Maddy shook her head. "So, why were you guys here originally?"

"Uh, the demon attacks," Sam recalled. She nodded.

"I knew all of the victims. One of them was my best friend, the other two people I'd interacted with on a daily basis."

"How did you know they were demon attacks?" Dean inquired.

"The way they behaved before they were killed. Suicides, everyone called it. But they exploded. Like they couldn't contain the demons. The smell of sulfur was everywhere where they died."

"Is there any reason that demons would be targeting you?" Cas said.

"Besides my mother being killed by a demon, I don't think so." Maddy responded, shrugging.

"What about your father?" Sam put in. "Where is he?"

"I don't know. I never met him. I always assumed he was dead, though."

"Why would you assume that he's dead?" Dean asked, confusion tinging his voice.

"Because my mother would always say that he was watching over me. But she would never tell me who he was, or what happened to him. Then she died, and I had no way of finding out. No one could remember him, not even my mother's parents."

"You said you stay with foster parents," Dean said. Maddy nodded. "Yeah. I lived with my grandparents for a few months, but they died soon, one after another. So I was sent off, and I've been with this foster family ever since."

There was a tense silence in the living room for a couple seconds. Sam broke it by setting his coffee cup down on the table.

"Thanks for letting us talk to you," he said. Maddy got up and set her own mug down, Cas and Dean following suit. She the two men and angel out of the house, holding the front door open for them as they left.

"No problem. I hope you catch those demons," she said. Dean saw her grin softly once more before shutting the door with a click. He turned around, leading Sam and Cas down back towards the Impala. He opened the driver's door of the black car and slid in. Sam was already sitting in the passenger seat with Cas situated in the back. Dean turned the keys in the ignition and pulled away from the curb.

"You're awful quiet, Cas," Dean said after a couple of minutes of driving down snow-covered streets.

"It's just... There's something about that girl," Cas said thoughtfully.

"Good something or bad something?" Sam wondered.

"I'm not sure," Cas mused, staring out the window. "She reminds me of someone."

"Who?" Dean asked.

"I don't know," Cas said angrily. "But it's bothering me."

"Well, you'll want to find out quick. These demons are after this girl, and we need to know why," Dean said, flicking his right blinker on automatically as he spoke.

"Hold on," Sam pulled out his laptop and connected it to the hotspot on his phone. He typed in a couple things and scanned whatever popped up quickly.

"We know that she goes to St. Michael's Catholic High School. She's a freshman, fifteen years old. And Catholic," Sam read off, scrolling down whatever he was reading on the laptop. "Was adopted by the Millers' when she was six. Has lived here her whole life. Her mother was killed just across town."

"I'd like to know why the Yellow-Eyed demon killed her. She breaks the pattern. Five when her mother was killed, and as far as we know, she's not psychic," Dean said, frustrated.

"I'm going to search around in heaven, see if anyone knows anything," Cas said.

"Wait, Cas-" Dean began. But he was interrupted by the sound of rustling feathers that usually accompanied the disappearance of an angel.

"Why does he always do that?" Dean said in exasperation.

"Well, while he's searching in heaven we can be looking down here. I can do more research at the motel if you want to go search the school," Sam suggested.

"Why not," Dean said. "Let's catch these sons of bitches."


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the favorites and follows!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWO**

Dean shoved open the entrance doors to St. Michael's Catholic School and burst out into the cool twilight air. He sighed heavily and strode off to where he parked his Impala. Searching the school was a bust. Just a bunch of empty classrooms and deserted hallways that were lined with old lockers. He had checked out the scenes of death of the three students, but there nothing left. Not even emf remained.

Dean whipped out his slim black cell phone and hit Sam's number on speed dial. As the phone rang he approached the Impala across a snow-covered parking lot and unlocked it, sliding into the driver's seat and adjusting the phone against his ear as he stuck the keys into the ignition and turned them, making the old motor rumble to life.

"Dean?" Sam answered finally, a clicking noise sounding over the connection as Sam answered the call.

"I got nothing," Dean said, clutching the phone between his head and shoulder as he backed out of the parking space. "You find anything on the Internet?"

"Not yet. I checked the background of the victims, but there's nothing that singles them out as possible demon attractions."

"Cas report back?"

"No. I wonder what he's looking for."

"That Maddy girl. He said something about her," Dean remembered. He could hear Sam type something on the other end of the phone into his computer.

"Yeah, I'm still thinking about her. I mean, she must have been one of the Yellow-Eyed demon's last victims."

"Why did he want her? She never showed up when this whole business with the psychics was going down," Dean said.

"Maybe she was too young," Sam speculated. "She would've been only about seven when it happened."

"The whole thing just seems strange. She was five when he attacked, too," Dean said. "Not six months old like everyone else."

"I don't know. I'm reading her past schools reports right now. She seems like a pretty good student. High grades." Then Sam chuckled slightly.

"What? So she's a nerd," Dean proclaimed.

"No, it's not that. For all of her studiousness, she's had quite a lot of detentions for various reasons," Sam read. "Talking back to teachers, yelling at other students, a couple fights. She's got quite the track record."

"Huh. A troublemaker," Dean grinned. "Though she seemed pretty quiet today."

"Her friends just died, Dean. They were killed by demons. I wouldn't blame her."

"I guess you're right," Dean said, sighing as he pulled into the drive through of a Panda Express. "I'm getting some Panda Express for dinner."

"Sounds good. I'll be here," Sam responded. Dean was about to hang up when Sam spoke up. "Don't forget the orange chicken like you did last time."

"I won't forget the orange chicken," Dean reassured his younger brother. "Keep researching. Be back soon."

Dean ended the call with one touch to a button in the screen of his phone and entered the restaurant, coming out a few minutes later with a bag of Chinese food in a white plastic bag swinging from his arm. He set it in the passenger seat of his car and drove down the road a couple blocks to the motel.

Dean took the second motel key and stuck it in the door of the motel when he arrived and hurried into the room, the blustery winter wind pushing at his back. He set the Chinese food bag down on a table and threw his car keys onto the bedside table to his right. Sam was sitting at the table, completely immersed in something he was reading on his laptop.

"Sammy," Dean called. He flicked Sam's ear.

"What the hell, Dean?" Sam said, coming out of his stupor.

"Food," Dean said, motioning toward the Chinese food whose aroma was spreading throughout the motel room. Sam reached forward and dug through the bag before pulling out his prized orange chicken. He took a black plastic fork and dug into the red paper box filled with the delicious chicken hungrily.

"Hey, save some for me," Dean admonished him, sticking his own fork in and taking a couple pieces of chicken. He plopped down into the chair opposite Sam and took his own carton of Lo Mein.

"Okay," Same began after a couple minutes of loud chewing. "So I haven't been able to find anything else on these students, but what I did find was that they are having their annual Christmas concert tonight at their school."

"And?"

"I think we should go. School doesn't come back into session until after Christmas, which isn't for a couple weeks. This would be the perfect night for a demon to take control of someone," Sam said. Dean nodded, taking a huge bite of some noodles.

"What time is it at?"

"7:00, which is approximately thirty minutes from now," Sam answered.

"Let's get this show on the road," Dean exclaimed, tossing his now empty box of Chinese food and snatching up his car keys.

"But Dean, I'm not finished," Sam said, gesturing toward his half eaten Chinese food. Dean shrugged. "Can't miss anything." He pulled the door open and walked outside. Sam followed with a resigned sigh. He grabbed their bag full of salt, an emf detector, knives, and anything else they might need when on the hunt. When Sam slid into the passenger seat of the Impala, Dean pulled out of the motel and drove towards the school. Once the brothers got there, they entered the building, greeted by the noise of parents and students as they got ready for the upcoming concert.

They snuck through a couple hallways until they reached the gym, where parents and other spectators were gathering in the bleachers. Students tuned up instruments and sang scales. Sam and Dean climbed all the way to the top of the bleachers and sat in the corner. Dean tapped his foot restlessly against the concrete floor of the bleachers. His arms were folded and his eyes narrowed. Watching a high school battle its way through traditional Christmas songs wasn't exactly his idea of fun.

About halfway through, Dean stood up. "I'm going to look around the school."

Sam only nodded in response, completely focused and scanning the crowd and students for any signs of possession. Dean made his way back down the bleachers, a couple people grumbling in annoyance as he passed in front of them. He pushed the doors open, sighing as he left the hot air of the gym and was suddenly in the colder air of the empty, dark hallway.

He started to wander around a bit, checking anywhere a demon could hide. His hand hovered over the gun concealed in the waistband of his jeans, ready to whip it out at a moment's notice.

Dean narrowed his eyes at a shadow that appeared to be moving by a window. He crept towards it, totally focused. Then he bumped into something.

"Hey!" A distinctly female voice yelled. Dean turned to see Maddy glaring at him, rubbing her shoulder.

"Watch it," she said. Dean turned back to the shadow. He relaxed when he realized it was only the shadow of a moving tree outside the window.

"What are you doing, running around the school with a gun?" She asked. Dean looked down at his gun then stuck it back into his jeans.

"Looking for demons," he answered, glancing quickly down the hall behind Maddy.

"I don't think you're going to find anything here," she said. "I haven't seen anything even remotely related to the supernatural since the last death."

"It was worth a try," Dean stated. Maddy shrugged.

"Where's that brother and friend of yours? The guy with the trench coat?"

"Sam is somewhere else. And Cas, the guy with the trench coat, is out looking for information."

"On the demon attacks?"

"Yeah." Dean looked behind him, searching the shadows, "I have to go. Stay out of trouble."

"I'll try," Maddy said, watching as Dean headed back down the way he came.

He met Sam outside the gym doors.

"Bupkis," Dean said, slowing to a halt in front of his younger brother. Sam shifted on his feet. He looked around the hallways at the walls impatiently, as if expecting to see the demons they were looking for pop out of nowhere.

"Where would they be besides here?" Sam questioned. Dean sighed, his hand resting on the concealed gun.

"I don't know."

Sam reached under his shirt and brought out the demon knife. "I'm going to look around one more time."

Dean nodded, following his brother up the stairs located next to the gym. They stole down the hallway, making sure their footsteps were light and soundless, their respective weapons ready to be whipped out and used at a moment's notice.

"Wait, Dean," Sam whispered. He held out his right hand to stop Dean from moving.

"What?"

Sam pointed to a classroom with a cracked door to his left. Dean narrowed his eyes. The faint sound of footsteps sounded from inside the room. Sam and Dean crept towards the room, then swung the door open, standing with their gun and knife out. The girl at the other end of the room swung around at the sudden noise.

"Maddy?" Dean realized.

"What are you doing back here?" Maddy asked, taking a couple steps forward, her hands held slightly up "You going to shoot me?"

Dean looked at the gun currently pointed at the young girl. He let his arms relax, the gun swinging by his side. "No. We thought you were a demon."

"To my knowledge, I'm not," she answered. She dropped her hands to her side.

"What are you doing here?" Sam spoke up. Maddy turned to grab a couple books from a desk behind her.

"I forgot my homework," she said, holding up the books. "I knew the doors wouldn't be locked because of the concert."

"Well, if you see anything, call us," Sam began. He pulled a piece of rumpled paper towards him and took a pen out of a desk, scribbling something down on the paper. When he held it out to Maddy, his phone number flashed. She reached out to take it, then was suddenly yanked to the side and slammed against the wall. She gasped, her breath knocked out of her by the impact. Sam and Dean spun around to see a couple of what looked like parents standing in the doorway. A man with blonde hair was holding his hand out, keeping Maddy pinned to the wall. A black-haired woman with a sly grin on her face stepped forward.

"The Winchester boys," she said, her mouth twitching up in a satisfied smile.

Dean held up his gun, aiming for the man holding Maddy, but had it yanked roughly out of his hands by an unseen force. The woman clicked her tongue.

"You should know better than to try something like that in us," the demon purred.

"Who are you? What do you want?" Sam asked, the knife clenched in his hand. The demon eyed the knife then grinned. "The girl."

"Why her? Why are you targeting her?" Sam continued while Dean slowly stepped back toward his gun.

"Because she has something we need," the black-haired demon said.

"Quit being vague. Just tell us," Dean snapped.

"Fine." The demon's head snapped around to stare at Dean intently. "Her blood."

"My what?" Maddy gasped out.

"Your blood. We need it," the blonde demon broke in. "And you two apes aren't going to stop us."

"We'll see about that," Dean said before snatching up his gun and firing two quick shots at the demons. The blonde demon dropped, a bullet lodged in his head. The second bullet hit the other demon in the chest. Maddy dropped to the ground from where she was being held high up on the wall. She struggled to stand, unable to put weight on what looked like her right leg.

Sam rushed forward with the knife to kill the other demon, but both demons exploded our of their vessels in clouds of black smoke, their screamed echoing down the hall.

"Come on," Dean said, running over to Maddy and helping her up. She winced and held onto Dean for support. "Those demons won't stay away forever. People would've heard those screams."

Sam led Dean and Maddy out of the school, his knife held out in front of him and ready for any attacking demons. Dean helped Maddy slide into the backseat of the Impala then took the driver's seat and drove away, the old engine protesting under the sudden increase of speed.

"Where are we going?" Maddy said from the back seat, pushing herself into a more comfortable position.

"Back to the motel," Dean answered.

"What about my foster parents? They'll be worried if I'm gone for long."

"I can't take you back there until make sure those demons are gone. And besides, looks like you hurt something," Dean said, glancing in the rear view mirror to view Maddy's face.

"It's fine. I've always had a bad right knee," she tried. Dean still shook his head. "Sorry princess. Can't be too careful."

"Don't call me princess," Maddy mumbled under her breath. Dean pulled into the motel and jumped out of the car, making sure Maddy and Sam got in the motel room before locking the door, looking around for any suspicious people.

"Lemme see that knee," Dean said after Maddy had settled on a bed. Sam opened the motel fridge and pulled out a beer, popping the top and tossing it in the open trash by the sink.

"You a doctor?" Maddy asked skeptically.

"No, but I've injured myself enough."

"It's fine. Really. I have a brace at home. I do this all the time," Maddy repeated, leaning back against the bed's headboard.

"Okay, if you're sure," Dean said, holding his hands up in defeat.

"I'm sure."

Sam sat at the table, reloading Dean's gun. "We'll probably only keep you a couple hours. The demons shouldn't be able to find you anytime soon. They don't know where you are."

"That's fine," Maddy said, her voice trailing off. Dean glanced at her then grabbed a beer, jumping on the other bed in the hotel and turning the TV on. After a couple seconds, Maddy raised her eyebrows.

"Dr. Sexy MD? Really?" She looked over at Dean. He shrugged. "It's good. I promise."

Maddy turned back to the TV, and after a couple hours and about four more episodes she was hooked and commenting on it with Dean.

"No! Why would you do that?" She shouted at a nurse on the screen. "God. She just ruined any chances she had with the Doctor."

"I know right? This show is great," Dean commented from where he was sitting.

"Hey Maddy, I can take you back home now," Sam broke in.

"What?" Maddy said distractedly, totally focused on the characters on the screen.

"I can take you home," Sam repeated.

"Oh, sure." Maddy got up and shrugged on her sweatshirt she had taken off just a bit earlier.

"I'll hold down the fort," Dean said as Maddy and Sam exited the motel room. Sam drove Maddy home, remembering the directions from earlier. He dropped her off with a couple warnings about watching for demons. Maddy nodded, then left the car with a small "thank you." On his way back to the motel, Sam thought about Maddy. Cas was right. She did seem familiar.

In the morning, back at the hotel, Sam and Dean were just getting ready for another day of demon hunting when Cas suddenly appeared, looking the same as ever; collected and put together.

"Cas, hey, what'd you find?" Dean asked as he tied his shoes.

"Something important," he began, looking around the motel room. "Have you seen Madeleine recently?"

"Yeah, we were attacked by some demons last night. I took her home," Sam said. "Why?"

"We have to get her," Cas said, urgency threaded through his voice. "She's in danger."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the favorites and follows! This chapter is shorter than the others, sorry about that. I use a bit of the second episode of the fifth season's dialogue, though there shouldn't be too much of rewriting in this. It's also finals week at my school, so I probably won't update for a bit. So enjoy and please review!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER THREE**

Sam and Dean reacted in a split second's time. Sam snatched up his gun. Dean had his car keys in his hands and was ready to go. The two men were at Maddy's house in just a few minutes, Cas sitting in the backseat with a thoughtful look on his face the whole time.

When they got out of the car at Maddy's house, it was eerily quiet. The street was devoid of any regular neighborhood sounds. Sam and Dean ran up to the ominous house, Cas close behind.

"Maddy!" Dean called, knocking on the door. When no one answered, he tired the door handle, the door creaking open seemingly by itself. Sam glanced at Dean worriedly before stepping lightly into the house, his angel blade in his hand and gun at the ready.

They creeped into the living room they had sat in before. Sam's eyes widened when he saw a crumpled dark shape against the far wall.

"Maddy!" He called, stuffing his gun into the waistband of his jeans and kneeling down. He put his hands gently under her head and lifting it up to see her face. Blood was still seeping out from several wounds, her eyes closed tight.

"Is she breathing?" Dean asked hurriedly as he dropped to his knees beside Sam. Sam passed his hand over her nose and felt a soft whisper of air as she breathed.

"Yes. She doesn't look too good though," Sam said, beginning to pull off his jacket to press to her wounds.

"Wait," Cas interrupted. The two brothers watched as the angel leaned down and pressed two fingers to Maddy's forehead. She gasped as her wounds disappeared in a flash of bright light, her eyes flying open. Her breath came in heaving gasps as she took in the faces surrounding her.

"Maddy, what happened?" Sam tried to ask.

"My foster parents." Maddy struggled out of Sam's grip and stood, almost collapsing again as her legs refused to take her weight.

"What happened?" Dean stood up, steadying her with a slight hand on her shoulder.

"Demons. God, their faces were horrible," she said, closing her eyes. "I've seen them before, but never like this. They attacked and stole my foster parents. I tried to fight back but they were stronger than anything I've ever seen before."

"Where did they take them?" Cas questioned. Maddy looked at him, then at the ground. "I'm not sure. They said something about a warehouse? I'm not too sure though."

Sam grimaced. "Let's get you back to the motel. We can research there."

Maddy nodded, and followed them out to the Impala and sat in the backseat next to Cas.

Back at the motel, Sam was tapping away at his computer, searching for any signs of demonic activity in the area. Dean was pacing, flipping a knife.

"Cas, can't just go find them?" Dean asked.

"No. They're hidden," Cas said. "I already tried."

"There has to be some way," Dean grumbled.

"I think I found something," Sam called. Cas and Dean bunched around the glowing computer, Maddy standing on the outside of the circle with her arms crossed.

"There's an abandoned warehouse outside of town. No one's been in there for years. This is what the demons might have been talking about," Sam said, clicking through to get a grainy black and white picture of an old, metal building. Dean shrugged. "Why not?"

"I'll meet you there," Cas said. He disappeared, accompanied by the light sound of fluttering wings. Sam shut the lid of his laptop. He tossed the Impala's car keys to Dean, who snatched them out of the air.

"Okay, let's go." Dean pushed the door to the motel room open, Sam and Maddy close behind. The car ride to the warehouse was silent except for the slight clicking noises as Sam loaded their guns. The warehouse was just a few miles out of the small Montana town, and it took only about ten short minutes on the empty farm roads. The driveway was gravel leading up to the warehouse, and when Dean got out of the car he almost slipped on the slippery rocks. Cas was waiting for them, angel blade out and ready for battle. Without speaking, the foursome headed toward the ominous building. When they reached an old, metal garage door, they paused. Dean bent down and managed to slide his fingers underneath and pulled the door up, the sound of rusted metal grating on their ears. Dean pulled out his gun, the others resting up as they walked into the building. Small windows along the wall lit up most of the huge, empty area except for a small office at the other end. Dean paused and took a deep breath, a harsh smell making his nose and throat burn.

"Sulfur," he whispered. Sam nodded, frowning. "But where are the demons?"

Dean turned around as Cas grunted, a man appearing out of seemingly nowhere and launching himself at the angel, a shiny blade in his hand. Cas flipped the demon to the ground and laid his hand on the demon's head. The demon screamed as he died, filling the warehouse with light. Then the body dropped and Cas turned back to the brothers, Maddy watching with raised eyebrows.

"Well, now we know they're here," Cas said. Sam and Dean nodded solemnly before creeping on towards the office. Right when the group reached the door to the office and Sam reached out to pull the handle, demons exploded out of nowhere, converging on them. Maddy ducked and weaved through the fighting demons, having been given to weapon. She looked back at Sam who motioned for her to open the office door before being assaulted by a tiny blonde girl. Maddy ducked under the waving arm of a demon and reached out for the cool metal door handle and pushed the door open, sliding in without any of the demons noticing. She reached around the walls for a light switch, unable to see in the pressing blackness. When she finally found the switch and flicked it on. She gasped when she saw the crumpled body of her foster mother, bound in chains. She rushed forward, kneeling before the hunched over figure. Her foster mother pulled her head up to see Maddy right in front of her, worry written over her face.

"Maddy," she breathed, pulling herself into a sitting position. "How did you get here?" Her eyes searched the younger girl's face.

"A couple of men," Maddy answered. "They can help."

"Who are these people? Why do they want us?"

Maddy paused. "They're demons. They're here for me."

"Why would they want you?"

"I don't know," Maddy whispered, sitting back on her heels for a moment. Then she leaned forward again, twisting the chains around to try and find a way to free her mother.

"Maddy!" Her most mother yelled when Maddy was pulled back by a tall, massive man dressed in a rumpled suit. He turned around and spoke in a husky voice, "Grab the woman."

A couple more demons pushed past Maddy and unchained her foster mother. The two were dragged out into the open where demons had Cas, Sam, and Dean pinned down. Maddy was yanked into the front of the circle of demons. Her foster mother was held up to the side, a knife held to her throat. Dean and Sam struggled to get out of their captors' grips, while Cas just surveyed the area and watched as the demon who held Maddy passed her off to another, stepping forward next to Maddy's foster mother.

"If you don't give us what we need," the demon said, "she dies."

Maddy's eyes widened, and began stringing to get out of the vice-like grip of the demon holding her.

"Ten seconds," the demon said, taking the knife from his partner and holding it against Maddy's foster mother's throat, a little head of blood tracking down to stain her collar.

"I don't know what you want," Maddy gasped desperately.

"Five seconds," the demon continued.

"What do you want?" Maddy yelled.

"Three seconds."

"Stop it!" Dean called out.

"You know what I want," the demon intoned before sliding the knife across the woman's throat. Blood soaked her shirt, Maddy's foster mother dropping to the ground heavily.

"No!" Maddy screamed, tears staining her face. The demon turned to her, his eyes narrowed, the bloody knife gripped in his hand.

"What do you need?" Maddy pleaded.

"The location of God. Where is he?" The demon asked.

"How would I know!"

Where is he?" The demon growled.

"I don't know!" Maddy choked out. "I don't know what you're talking about! Where's John? Where's my foster father?"

"We killed him too," the demon said matter-of-factly. Maddy's hands tightened. "They did nothing wrong!"

"But they did," the demon said. "They got in our way. And now you're going to tell us what we need."

"I don't know!" Maddy screamed. Dean and Sam could only look on helplessly as the demon approached Maddy, his knife raised.

"You don't tell me, you go down just like that other bitch," the demon threatened. Maddy shook her head, staring right at the demon. "Go ahead."

The demon raised his knife, prepared to kill the girl, when an explosion of golden light lit up the warehouse. The demon were blown back, along with Sam, Dean, and Cas. Maddy stood in the center, wreathed in golden light. She reached down to pick up the dropped knife and raised her hand, causing black smoke to pour out of all of the demons and massing into one giant cloud. Then the cloud was dropped to the ground, disappearing into a fiery circle that burned into the concrete floor. The last demon standing, the leader, rushed at her, preparing to tackle her to the ground. She turned around and plunged the knife into the demon. The demon flickered, choking as he fell. Dean sat up, meeting Cas and Sam's gazes. Maddy dropped to the ground, exhausted. Dean jogged over to her, checking her over.

"She looks fine," he said. Sam frowned. "What was that?"

Cas stepped up next to Sam, studying the limp form of the young girl.

"She's a Nephilim," Cas informed the brothers.

"What, like half angel half human?" Dean looked up at Cas, incredulous.

"Yes. One of the only ones."

"No wonder the demons wanted her," Sam breathed.

"But why would they ask her for the location of God?" Dean wondered. "Is he even real?"

"Yes. And he's missing," Cas said solemnly. "And I think I need to find him."

{-}

Dean and Sam were standing in the doorway of Bobby's hospital room, Maddy leaning against the wall and staring blankly. She looked over at Sam and Dean, who were talking to Cas who just appeared. She glanced away.

"You're hidden from angels now- all angels. I won't be able to simply-" Cas started, slightly annoyed.

"Enough foreplay," called a gruff voice from inside the room. "Get healing, now."

"I can't," Cas said after a moment's pause.

"Say again?"

"I'm cut off from much of heaven's power. Certain things I can do. Certain things I can't."

"You're telling me you lost your mojo just in time to get me stuck in this trap for the rest of my life?" The gruff voice got louder as the sentence went on.

"I'm sorry," Cas tried.

"Shove it up your ass. What about angel girl over there?"

Maddy shifted to look over at Cas. Cas met her eyes. She shook her head, tired and drained.

"She just got her powers, Bobby. She won't be able to do much for a while," Dean reminded him.

"At least he's talking now," Sam said, shrugging.

"I heard that."

"I don't have much time. We need to talk," Cas said, turning to Sam and Dean.

"Okay," Dean said.

"Your plans to kill Lucifer," Cas began.

"Yeah. You want to help?" Dean offered.

"No. It's foolish. It can't be done," Cas stated.

"Oh, thanks for the support," Dean scoffed, turning away.

"But I believe I have the solution. There is someone besides Michael strong enough to take on Lucifer. Strong enough to stop the apocalypse," Cas said.

"Who's that?" Sam broke in.

"The one who resurrected me and out you in that airplane. The one who began everything. God."

Dean glanced over at Sam. "We've been over this. He doesn't exist. And evem if he did, where is he?"

"He's hiding. I'm going to find God," Cas said. He looked back at Maddy. "And she's going to help."


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey! It's been a while, sorry about that. First it was finals, then it was state for speech and drama, then I got sick, and it was like AAAAAAGAGGGHHHHH. So I switched the POV in this chapter to Maddy's. That's how it should remain for the rest of the fanfic, I hope it's not too confusing. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this! Thanks for the follows and favs, and please R &R! Also a small note- I don't mean to offend anyone by what I say about God later in this chapter. I'm Catholic myself. This is all if just coming from my twisted mind. :) so... R&R, and enjoy!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER FOUR**

I could hear Dean, Sam, and that strange angel named Cas arguing for a bit outside the older man's hotel room. Their voices were a low drone in the background, like a fuzzy radio station that couldn't completely be heard. All I could see and hear was  
the sound of that demon killing the one mother I truly knew and loved. The blood staining her clothes, her limp body dropping to the ground as the demon snarled at me. I could see his true form shifting like a restless animal trapped in a cage around  
in his vessel, snarling and twisting as it slid that knife across her throat, a single drop of blood tracking down her throat, then a flood of red. I clenched my fists. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to be at home with my foster parents and my  
friends, my only worries about homework or a hopeless crush on another classmate. I wanted to be normal.

But it's too late for that, a small, nagging voice inside my head said. You were never normal.

You will always be lost and confused. You'll always be alone.

"She's going to help me," Cas's voice broke through the clouds in my mind, jerking me into reality. I pushed all thoughts to the back of my head as Cas pointed at me, Sam and Dean looking at me expectantly. I frowned.

"What? Help you with what?" I asked, glancing from face to face.

"Help me find God," Cas said matter-of-factly.

"What?" I repeated.

"God."

"No I know, but- isn't God where he always is? In heaven?" I said.

"Not anymore. Not for a long time," Cas answered sadly. I swallowed hard. For some reason, that frightened me more than seeing my foster mother murdered. Even more than walking into the bathroom to see my best friend dead, killed by being possessed by  
a demon.

"Come on, Cas," Dead prompted. "Let's talk inside for a second."

Cas glanced back at me one more time before disappearing in the hospital room with Sam and Dean. I leaned back against the cold walls of the hospital, my arms folded as I watched nurses and patients bustling around the halls. I couldn't hear the conversation  
going on in the room, only murmurs through the old, thin walls. I absentmindedly picked at a loose thread in the sweatshirt I was wearing. I was restless, constantly shifting my feet and flicking my eyes from one person to another warily. Something  
about the hospital bothered me. Or maybe it was just the news delivered by Cas just a few moments earlier that refused to leave me alone.

"Let's go," Cas said from beside me, appearing out of thin air. I jumped, jerking away from him.

"Go where?"

"I told you. To find God."

"But isn't the world a big place to search alone?" I wondered, one eyebrow raised questionably.

"That is why I have this," Cas said, holding up a small golden amulet looped on a black cord. "And I'm not alone. You're coming with me, remember?"

"Wait-" I tried to protest before Cas reached out and touched my forehead with two fingers, and we disappeared in a flash of light. My stomach lurched, hurtling into my throat as I was jerked roughly behind Cas as he flew to wherever he was going. When  
we landed, I immediately slammed into something hard. When my eyes adjusted, I realized I had hit a bookcase, a couple books tumbling around me. I winced as I felt a couple splinters find their way into my hand from the rough edges of the bookcase.

"You seriously need to learn the three D's of apparition," I coughed.

"What?"

"Determination, destination, deliberation. Harry Potter, Half-Blood Prince? Book Six?"

"What's Harry Potter," Cas wondered from where he stood a few feet away.

"You seriously need some culture," I informed the angel. I righted myself, picking the small wooden bits out and blinking to see we were standing in the middle of a sunlit room, bookshelves lining the walls and a large window letting a huge ray of sunlight  
into the room, making the old leather bound books shine with their fancy embossed titles.

"Where are we?" I walked a few steps, glancing around the room.

"Somewhere safe, hopefully," Cas said. "The angels shouldn't be able to find us here."

"Angels? You meant there's more of you?"

"There's countless angels in heaven, but the ones I'm worried about are Michael and Raphael. They will be out searching for us, especially since Lucifer has escaped."

"Lucifer? Raphael? Michael the Archangel?" I stepped forward, my hands held up. "Are you serious?"

"I thought you were Catholic. Isn't this included in your faith?" Cas inquired.

"Yeah, but you don't normally meet angels before you're dead," I stated simply. Cas just shrugged, inspecting a wall and nodding.

"Good. The sigils are still here."

"You mean those glowing symbols on the walls?" I asked, noticing the glowing white marks that shone all around the room.

"Yes. They should keep the angels out."

"Then how are you here?"

"It's simple. I put the markings here with the sole purpose of hiding me and any of my welcome friends, including you." Cas strode over to a bookshelf and inspected the spines before picking out a blue book with black writing. He handed it to me.

"A Bible?" I remarked.

"Yes. There should be some clues on the whereabouts of God in there. If not, we'll have to search somewhere else."

"So I just read the whole Bible and hope I find something?"

"Just Revelation should do."

I paused for a second, piecing together our conversation. "You said Lucifer is back. Do you mean Satan?"

"That's exactly who I mean. And he'll be after you, just give him a little bit," Cas warned.

I tried to ignore the anxiety making my stomach turn at the statement. "What does he want me for?"

"You're a Nephilim. You have special abilities even I don't have."

I paused. "Like what? I'm just a normal human being, what am I supposed to do?"

"I'll explain later," Cas said shortly, obviously annoyed by all the questions. "For now, read."

I looked away, hurt by the curtness of his tone, heading toward a desk and chair. I settled in, blowing a soft layer of dust off it and cracking open the Bible, flipping past to the back. I read for a few minutes before speaking up again, hesitatingly  
at first.

"Cas, if God isn't in heaven, then where is he? Have we all just been praying to emptiness? Is he even real?"

"I can assure you," Cas said, turning to me. "He's as real as you and me."

"Then where is he? He's supposed to love us above all things, to always be with us and listening. He wouldn't just disappear." I could hear my voice rising with every word, my eyes searching Cas's face for an answer.

"I'm sorry, but the God you have been taught about is not who he seems," Cas replied slowly, his face seeming to age many years as sadness overtook it. "The Father you and I have loved and cared for is gone. But it's up to us to find him." Cas stepped  
forward, resting his hand on the edge of the desk. "Because God needs us just as much as we need him."

I let Cas's words settle in my mind, making me bite my bottom lip nervously them lean forward to pick up the Bible again. "Then let's get to work."

{~~~~~}

"Cas we've been here for almost six hours. I got nothing." I thumped yet another book on the desk, causing dust to fly in the air. Cas, who was pacing by the window that was now dark from the descent of night, rubbed his forehead with a weary hand.

"We must have missed something," Cas sighed. "Are you sure you read the correct books?"

"Yes, I'm sure," I answered shortly. I watched Cas take out his silver angel blade and plunge it into a table, the small blade quivering as it stuck in the grain of the wood. I shifted in my chair, my back sore from sitting for so long. What did we miss?

"Cas, what if we are looking at the wrong stuff?" I explained. "We're looking at older books, books that have been around for years, if not centuries. God has to move around lot, being an all-powerful being and all. Maybe if we want to find him, we have  
to look at more recent findings."

Cas's eyes widened. "You may be right."

"Do you still have that amulet?"

Cas fumbled in his coat and brought out the necklace, the golden amulet swinging. I reached for it, Cas dropping the necklace into my hand. I ran my thumb over it, the metal warm from sitting in Cas's pocket.

"It doesn't seem very special. How is this supposed to help us?" I asked, letting the amulet rest on the palm of my hand, the metal glinting in the light of the lamp in the desk.

"It'll burn hot in God's presence," Cas informed me. He took the amulet back, sliding it back into his pocket. "It should warn us if God is near."

"Well you have fun searching the whole world then," I said sarcastically. "Because we need something more powerful than a tiny amulet to find God in such a big world."

"Then what are your ideas?" Cas asked, anger spiking in his tone.

"I don't know, you just dragged me along," I responded, my hand clenched on top the desk. "I just found out I am a half angel freak who can go all Avatar Mode and kill demons. How am I supposed to know where God is?"

"You have special connection with God. You should be able to sense him," Cas countered.

"But I can't! I don't know where he is anymore than you. It's not like I get messages from him telling me 'Hey, I'm over here, why don't you come and get me?'" I was practically shouting at Cas. I expecting him to yell something back, to try to convince  
me that I really was special, but he just stared at me.

"Wait, Maddy. What you just said," Cas began. I shook my head. "What?"

"That you don't get messages from him. I know someone who does. Or, more like, knows all that happens in the supernatural world." Cas pulled his angel blade from the table, sliding it up his sleeve.

"Who? Where are we going?" I stood up, tense and watching Cas's every move.

"To visit Chuck Shurley. He's a prophet of the Lord. I'm not sure where he is after what happened the last time we met, but he shouldn't be too hard to find," Cas explained. He stepped forward, fingers outstretched, and transported us away from the room.  
I winced as we landed, the ground uneven and torn up. I blinked rapidly and a destroyed house came into view. Wood was everywhere, the house seemingly ripped apart from the inside. Various prices of furniture and debris littered the sparse grass in  
front of the house.

"It looks like a bomb went off here," I said, stepping over s particularly large hunk of wood.

"This is Chuck's old house," Cas said from behind me. "Last time I was here, I fought with one of my brothers, Raphael. I was killed in the fight. Chuck managed to escape."

"You were killed?" I looked back at Cas. I raised my eyebrows. "You see, pretty healthy for a dead guy."

"Someone brought me back," Cas said. "I wasn't dead for long."

I nodded slowly, then lifted some debris with my foot half-heartedly. "What are we looking for?"

"Any clues to where Chuck might have gone. Books, papers, anything of the like."

I sighed, rubbing my arms as the cold night air stung any bare skin. "I guess you take one side I take the other."

Cas moved off to being looking, but then suddenly a flash of light made me turn. A tall, sharply-dressedman stood there, his gaze menacing. I glanced over at Cas, who stood straight and tall, his angel blade clutched in his hand.

"Raphael," he greeted the man. I jerked back to the man. This was the archangel Raphael?

"Castiel. I didn't expect to find you here." His voice was deep and smooth, but commanding.

"I'm looking for something," he answered shortly.

"I see you have a friend now." Raphael turned to me, looking me up and down. "And a Nephilim, no less. Where did you find her?"

"That doesn't matter. What are you doing here?" Cas demanded. I could feel the tension between the two brothers as they faced each other, blades out and at the ready.

"Making sure you don't find Chuck," Raphael said, swinging his blade up only to meet Cas's. I felt helpless as they fought, blades ringing as they clashed together. Cas managed to get in a good hit on Raphael's shoulder before the larger man beat him  
down. Cas's angel blade flew out of his hand and clattered in the ground right in front of me. Raphael held Cas down, letting his blade prick Cas's throat.

"I can kill you again," Raphael snarled. "Right here, right now."

"No," Cas gasped out. In a split second, I jumped forward, picking up the angel blade, then plunged it into Raphael's shoulder. He yelled in pain. The blade was yanked from my hands when Raphael jerked away from me, taking the blade with him. Raphael  
pulled the blade out, blood soaking his dark suit. He faced me, angel blade raised. I could see his arm descending, almost in slow motion. I tried to move, but my muscles were frozen. I could see Cas moving out of the corner of my eye, but it didn't  
register what he was doing until his fingers were on my forehead, sending me God-knows-where. I landed hard, my head crashing into something hard. It exploded in a starburst of pain, making a wave of darkness surge up and send me spiraling into blackness


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER FIVE**

My head was pounding. I winced as I rolled over, opening my eyes slowly. Something sweet filled my nose, and I recognized it as the smell of freshly mown grass. I sat up, by back sore and protesting. I rubbed my forehead. Where was I?

I struggled to my feet, my clothes spotted with water from the dewy blades of grass. The air feltwarm, like summer. I was standing in the middle of a large stretch of grass that was dotted with lush green trees that waved in a gentle breeze. I flinched as a frisbee flew past me, an eager dog following it. I turned, following the dog with wide eyes. A small boy was sprinting after the dog, yelling its name over and over. I looked ahead to see people all over, some playing with their small children or relaxing in the shade of a tree. A particular couple caught my eye. I squinted. The man seemed familiar. He had long brown hair, his long legs stretched out in front of him. A smaller blonde woman was sitting next to him, safe under the protection of the man's arms that was slung around her shoulder. After a second, the woman said something to the man, then got up, heading toward what looked like a coffee stand. I took a couple steps forward, the man's face becoming clearer.

"Sam?" I whispered. "Sam!" I ran to him, all pain pushed to the back of my mind. My feet slipped on the wet grass as I stumbled to a halt. "Sam, come on." I stood right in front of him. When he didn't answer, I leaned forward to shake his shoulder, but my hand passed right through it as if Sam didn't exist.

"Sam, where am I? What's happening?"

"He won't respond."

I turned to see the blonde woman. She was holding two cups of coffee. Her blue eyes were sad, a dull blue that seemed once so full of life.

"Who are you?" I asked while she stepped forward, setting one of the coffee cups down carefully beside Sam. I frowned when Sam suddenly starting talking to someone that wasn't there. It was if it was a one sided conversation, or one where I couldn't hear or see the other person.

"My name is Jessica."

"What's wrong with him?"

Jessica sighed, running her hands through her hair. "He's not really here. Not like we are."

"What do you mean? Where are we?"

"Heaven."

"This is heaven?" I turned to look at the park scene behind me. "I thought heaven was one big place. Are all these people dead too?"

"No. They're memories. When someone goes to heaven, they relive their favorite memories." Jessica looked over at Sam, a small smile gracing her lips. Then she glanced back at me. "But if you're here, why aren't you in your own personal heaven? How did you get in mine?"

I recalled the flash of light, the sensation of being transported. Raphael attaching Cas. "I don't think I got here the normal way."

"You mean you're not dead?"

I shook my head. "I need a way to leave. Do you know of any?"

"I haven't been here for long, but from what I've heard you need to follow a path."

"A path?" I searched around, my gaze resting on a small paved path that ran through some trees. I pointed. "Like that?"

"Maybe. I'm sorry, but I'm not sure. I haven't been here for long." Jessica slid her hands into her pockets. "How do you know Sam?"

"He saved me," I whispered.

"Well, at least he saved someone," Jessica muttered, resentment spiking in her tone.

"What do you mean?"

"I was killed by a demon. A demon with yellow eyes. He burned me, sending me to hell. I was tortured for months. Maybe even years." Jessica clenched her fist, then relaxed, her body seeming to collapse. "But that's over now. I can't blame Sam for it. It wasn't his fault."

"My mother was killed by a demon, too. I wonder if she's here," I said softly. Jessica answered, "Maybe she is. I was pulled out of hell by something, maybe she was too."

I nodded, focused on a tiny blade of grass that waved in the sunlight, myarms crossed tightly. I shook my head. "So all I do is follow the path?"

"That's the legend. Follow the path, and it will lead you where you need to go," Jessica said. I nodded slowly. "Thank you for your help."

"No problem. Stay safe," Jessica said. I began to walk away, but after a couple seconds Jessica called out, "What's your name?"

I turned back around to see her back in Sam's embrace. "Maddy."

"Good luck, Maddy."

I waved, then took a deep breath in. I swallowed hard, taking one more step so I was standing only on the path. I let it out slowly. Nothing changed. I continued my walk, heading down the path through the calm trees, a certain peace that I hadn't felt in a while settling in me. If this was heaven, this wasn't too bad.

But then the peace was shattered by bright lights breaking through the trees, a faint screaming echoing through the air. I stumbled, throwing my hands up in front of my face to block the light. I could hear Enochian words being spoken, too faint to decipher.

Panic flared up in my stomach. I tried to turn and run, my feet slipping on fallen leaves. I made it a couple steps, my heart thrumming frantically in my chest when I stumbled to a starling halt right in front of a menacing man who stood with his arms crossed and a triumphic smile on his face. I took a couple steps back, then turned and ran again in the opposite direction. But again, the man was there, seemingly to have appeared out of nowhere. I tried to back away, but instead I walked right into the clutches of a couple more men. They held my arms by my side, forcing me to stay still and watch the man slowly walk forward. His shiny black shoes and pressed suit were out of place in the forest, his grin making me feel uneasy. He stopped right in front of me, taking a deep breath. He was going to take him time on this.

"So. Where do you think you're going?" He asked, bringing his hands behind his back. He raised one eyebrow while I struggled to come up with an answer.

"I-I'm sorry I don't know who you are?" I lied quickly. The man stepped closer. Sweat slicked my palms, my heartbeat speeding up as he came closer and closer.

"Now, I wouldn't lie to an angel if I were you," he admonished.

"Angel? You don't look much like an angel," I scoffed. The man's jaw tightened. He leaned back, striding a couple steps away.

"Oh, I think you'll come to find I'm more of an angel than anyone else," he said. He paused. "Now tell me how you got here."

"I swear, I don't know," I tried. I winced as one of the men holding me whipped out a sliver blade, holding it against my throat. I swallowed nervously.

"Really? Would that still be your answer if I let the knife go just a little bit further?" The man mused. He looked me dead in the eye. "I said. How did you get here?"

"I'm not telling you crap," I hissed. Suddenly, the man was right in front of me, his hand tightening around my jaw. He leaned in. I could feel his breath on my face.

"I'm not one to mess around with or insult. I could make your life hell without even batting an eye," he growled. He dug his fingers into my face, making me gasp for breath. "Tell me now!"

"No!" I shouted. I could see his eyes go from angry to plain fury. He whipped his blade out and levelled it at my chest in about half a second. I knew that this time, he wasn't going to hesitate. I could feel the point of the blade just touch my skin. Tensed up and tried to kick him away, but his henchmen held me too tight. I was stuck like a rat in a trap. Useless and vulnerable.

"Zachariah. Unhand her."

The black suddenly stopped. I slowly opened my eyes to see the figure of another man in the distance. The man- Zachariah- whipped around.

"What are you doing here? I am doing business," he spat. The figure of the man came into focus. He was older with salt-and-pepper hair, his eyes tired and old but full of kindness.

"So am I."

And with those words, the angels holding me were blown back, crashing into trees with loud yells. Zachariah growled deep in his throat, taking the blade away from me. As he was distracted, I quickly kicked him in the knee, his leg buckling. While he fell, I landed a blow to his face, my knuckles stinging. I prepared to deliver another blow, but the older man stepped forward.

"That's enough," he said. He reached out a hand. I flinched back, expecting him to either put me out or straight up attack me. But instead, as he drew his hand away, I was still awake and alive. But there was something else wrong.

"Uh, where are we?" I looked around. The trees had disappeared, and instead had been replaced with a small lawn surrounded by a white wooden fence. Bright flowers bloomed along the fence, the sun beating down on me. Was I back on Earth?

"You're in the center of heaven." The old man stepped out in front of me, a small smile on his lips.

"I thought it was supposed to be the garden of Eden," I said. The man shrugged.

"People see what they want to see. For you, it's-"

"My mother's garden," I whispered. I recognized the fence now, the line of purple lilacs that bloomed along it.

"Yes," the man nodded. He sighed, then directed me over to a table with two chairs. He motioned for me to sit in one of them. I did so cautiously, still not sure whether or not to trust this man.

"I'm Joshua," he said, sitting down in the other chair. "I tend the garden, prune the bushes, and water the flowers. Among other things."

"You're a gardener," I realized. Joshua nodded slowly.

"That's exactly what I am. And I am here to speak to you on someone else's behalf," he said.

"Who?"

"God."

I jerked my head around sharply, not sure if I heard him correctly. "God? Like the one, the only God?"

"Yes."

"What would he want with me?" I asked. "I'm not that important."

"Oh, I think you'll find that everyone is important in their own ways. Including you," Joshua said. I laughed softly.

"Thank you. I guess." I hesitated, then shook my head. "I'm sorry, I just don't- I just don't understand."

"What don't you understand?" Joshua urged quietly.

"All of this." I waved vaguely at the peaceful garden that surrounded us. "The angles, demons, the apocalypse. God. I mean, I thought angels were supposed to help people, not attack each other. And why isn't God himself speaking to me right now, instead of you? No offense, but if I were that important, wouldn't God speak to me himself?"

Joshua settled back into his chair. "A lot of things aren't what they seem. And unfortunately, that goes for the angels, and even God, too. Over the millennia, stories get mixed and changed. Lines tend to blur. And soon enough, what you thought was something was isn't that at all. It's completely different." Joshua folded his hands in his lap. He looked like the innocent grandparent that wouldn't hesitate to help you and ways had a bit of kindness and a little bit of sadness in their eyes. He didn't look like an angel that knew God.

"You said God has a message for me?" I prompted.

"Oh yes. He said to tell you to stop searching for him."

"What? Why? Doesn't the Bible say that he will be the one to kill Lucifer or whatever?" I protested.

"Like I said. Stories get twisted, changed. And unfortunately, that was one of them." Joshua paused, as if he were considering if he should continue. "God told me to tell you to give up on him."

I stood up, knocking my chair back. "But that's against everything's that he's every said. You're always supposed to have faith. That's the core belief." I could feel everything I had been taught and believed in shatter and fall to pieces like a mirror dropped on the ground. Even though that belief had long been since hanging by a thread, this was the scizzors that finally cut it.

"Stop trying to rely on him to solve all of your problems," Joshua continued. "Sometimes, someone has to take action. And God has chosen you."

"Why me? If he doesn't believe in anything, why is he doing this?"

Joshua sat forward. "Because he's looking for someone to believe in. He's lost faith. He's a gardener, like me. And he's tried his hardest to keep the weeds from taking over, but there comes a point where it's a lost cause. You need to believe that you have the power within you to save the world." Joshua reached forward, taking my forearm gently in his own hand. My veins stood out, but instead of red blood running through them, gold threads twined their way down my arm. I felt my breath quicken. My head became fuzzy and light headed, my vision blurring for a moment. When I could see clearly again, the world seemed sharper, more vibrant. I gasped. Behind Joshua was a pair of pristine, white wings that were folded neatly behind his back. I could see his grace pumping through his veins and swirling inside his eyes, giving the dark brown a bright blue tint.

Joshua looked up at me, meeting my eyes.

"You have angel blood in you. I've removed your barriers, you can see clearly now. You have more power than anyone can ever imagine. You can choose to use it for good, or use it for evil. It's completely up to you." Joshua let go of my arm. I held it close to my chest, the gold fading away.

"I trust you'll make the right choice."

I rubbed my forehead. "I'm sorry. This is all just hard to process."

"It's perfectly okay. Take your time. Let it sink in." Joshua put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "I'm going to send you back to Sam and Dean. Help them in their hunts and their search, but don't tell them of this. Their time to meet me will come." He took his hand off my shoulder and held it up, preparing to send me back.

"Wait. Do you know who my father is?" I asked quickly. Joshua's eyes softened.

"I'm afraid even God doesn't know."

"But-"

My protest was cut off as a blinding light shone from Joshua's hand. I was blown backwards, then landed with a jolt. I could hear someone cussing right behind me. I turned around to see Dean standing with a spilled beer, his eyes wide.

"Jesus, girl. Where did you come from?"

I frowned. "I'm not really sure," I managed before a wave of nausea hit me, making my head spin and my ears ring. I could faintly feel myself falling and see Dean rushing forward right before my vision went black, my last coherent thought being, _'Damn. Two blackouts in one day."_ Then silence.


End file.
